File Folders

I have been studying all the days of my life. I have been learning a lot though, and not just micro and anatomy.

Last night, when I couldn’t sleep at 2:30 in the morning, I was thinking about how much information that I had put in my brain yesterday. And I started to think (granted this was in the middle of the night) that my brain was like a shelf. A shelf that was longer than I could see and stuffed full of file folders. Each time that I learn something new I either create a new folder or place new information in an existing folder.

Then I got to thinking that from the moment you are born you start to store information in folders. Like the “how to eat” folder. Then as you grow up you start to have more folders, such as the “language” folder. Then when you learn how to read you put that information into the “language” folder in a subfolder that would be labeled “reading.” Another example would be the “math” folder. I remember being shocked when I realized that subtracting was actually adding negative numbers. Who knew? But I wouldn’t have been able to understand this concept if I didn’t already have addition and subtraction in my “math” folder. I would not have been able to just create a new folder for “addition of negative numbers” if I didn’t already have a “math” folder with “addition” and “subtraction” subfolders. Is this making sense because in my “sense” folder it is but it may not make sense in your “sense” folder. Which leads me to my next point.

Everyone files their folders differently. Studying with a buddy isn’t really my style, but yesterday I gave it a try and I am glad I did. Alyssa and I studied all afternoon for micro and then Genevieve and I studied all evening for anatomy. Talking things over with each of them showed me that everyone learns material differently. I believe Genevieve is a very organized filer because she is able to locate information very quickly. Where I have the information in my head but much less organized and thus it takes me longer to process the question and locate the answer. Alyssa is just a smarty pants. I am not sure how she organizes, but I want that system.

PS. I wrote this blog faster than any other I have ever written. I am on my third cup of coffee this morning and I am jittery beyond belief. I just want to take my test this second but I need to calmly wait for another…hour, are you kidding me? I thought it had to be at least 1:00. So if this blog made no sense it is either because a) it really didn’t make any sense like the concept was just ridiculous or b) I am caffeinated out of my mind. I think both are likely.

Observations from Grandfather's Chair

I am sitting here in the Grandfather’s chair in the living room across from my pretty in cream friend Alicia who is frantically looking through folders and paper holder things and hitting herself in the face with the paper holder things and typing away at a paper and then looking over at me with “I dislike you very much right now because you do not have homework” eyes…life is so good, and hilarious. Since I do not have to do anything truly productive tonight, in typical Kayla fashion, I have been thinking.

Now some of you and some of my ex-boys friends are quite shocked right now. Believe it or not, I actually think a lot.

1. I like seasons of the Bachelorette better than the Bachelor. Think back to when Trista was the bachelorette, best season ever. She picked Ryan Sutter, got engaged at the end of the show, got married in an---I’ll admit---creepy wedding, stayed married, and now have a son named Max. They are doing well living in the mountains in Boulder, Colorado. It worked out. Why did this one work out? In my professional dating opinion, it is because the guys had to chase after the girl. This is what girls really want. And I have been told by numerous guys and a couple of bad dating advice books from home and family class that guys also like the chase. This is more how a dating relationship is suppose to work rather than the girls chasing the guy. Look at me giving dating advice…not really, just something I noticed.

2. I am not stoked for the semester to be over. Is this weird? Should I go see a specialist? Usually by this time I am counting done the days, the class periods, the tests until the end and I would never look back. This time I am pretty neutral. Albeit, I am glad that I never have to sit through a Kelly Johnson anatomy lecture ever again and for this I am truly grateful. But it has gone by so fast and we have had such a good time it is just a little sad that it is over.

3. I have never ever said those words before. I usually don’t get sad when things are over because I am excited about what is coming ahead. And I am excited for next semester, I just need to stop being emotional.

4. This guy from my speech class wants to run for President. He gave a persuasive speech on why he is a better candidate than any of the actual candidates. He was fairly convincing. Rob Conrad for a better America.

5. Alicia just reminded me of when we were leaving Manhattan after the KU K-State football game where my loves beat the other guys. She accidentally called Dan Ron and it was hilarious.

6. I bought caramel apples today for all my roommates for a fun little treat and apparently no one likes them.

7. I can only do so much thinking. Peace out.

We are Psychologist: Fun Fun Fun.

My close friends and I have created something that we believe will be as influential to society as Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. We call it the Pyramid of Glee. You see, there are three different levels of fun that can and often build upon one another. Here is an example of a pyramid that we will be referring to the rest of this blog.

The blue portion represents fun. This is the kind of fun that happens everyday. Some examples include: Alicia’s singing songs and changing the words (like yesterday. Lyrics are suppose to go “take you cat and leave my sweater” and she changed it to “shave your cat and weave a sweater.” I laughed for a while.) or when my roommates come into my room wearing random hats and had a impromptu dance party without music.

The green section represents so fun. This is the type of fun that happens often and you look forward to, but you will not lose sleep over it. Some examples would include: making weekend plans on a Monday for a sweet night out with your girls (however, if you are a guy, we are not talking about date night…that is example 2...but this would be a night out with the guys for you.) Another example would be being asked out on a date getting to look forward to it and dressing up.

And finally the purple portion represents way fun. This is the kind of fun that one looks forward to for a long time, like a vacation or summer. Sometimes this level of fun can be dangerous and result in anxiety or over stimulation; however, if these symptoms can be avoided, way fun will follow.

Each level of fun can build on the others but does not necessarily have to. For example, if you are participation in something that would fall into the so fun category, fun will simultaneously occur. Also, if you are participating in way fun, fun and quite possibly so fun will also happen.

The levels do not have to build on each other. You could decided to do something so fun, and end up not having fun at all. However, that would nullify the entire pyramid because it is based on fun, after all. Thus, you can do something that is potentially way fun and break down the entire fun pyramid and thus break our little hearts because all we really want this to accomplish is for you to have some fun.

Laundry and Growing Up: Out of Control

Wrote on Thursday, November 15, 2007, right before the computer strike.

Here is the thing--- I have so much laundry that it no longer fits into the basket, or the area around the basket and it is starting to trickle into the rest of my room. I am guessing around 5 loads worth, and we are not talking small nicely sorted loads. I mean stuff as much of whatever you possibly can into the machine type loads. So I did what any logical college student would do. All you responsible people are thinking “oh, she did the laundry.” No I actually did one load. But I have failed to mention that I am going home in 5 days and you know what that means---Mom and free laundry. Now you responsible ones are thinking that I am so irresponsible that I #1 let the laundry situation get so bad and #2 I then did one load of a mixture of lights, darks, softs, towels, dryables and nondryables just to get through the week, and #3 now I am going to allow my mom to take care of the problem for me. I know irresponsible…and that is what I would have used to do. Mom would still do it for me if I would want her too, but I not going to let her do it since it is a serious amount of laundry. Maybe I am growing up. No one ever told me that part of growing up was being embarrassed by the amount of laundry you have. I guess whatever it takes to get one to do their own laundry, embarrassment is included.


Wrote on Wednesday, November 21, 2007, while doing laundry and homework.

Here is the thing---I am doing laundry. And lots of it. I wasn’t too far off on my guess of 5 loads. Right now we are on load #3 and we have at least one huge if not two regular sized loads left. I guess I am growing up.
The computer is fixed thank the Lord and Chris. He is a little computer genius. “Oh, it wasn’t a big deal. Just ran four or five commands on it and it just starting working no problem.” Let me tell you what a big deal that actually is. I am now able to do homework (mixed blessing) and check my email and bboard and facebook. You all know the drill. I never realized how dependent I am on my computer. It was a little unsettling to know that some parts of my life come to a halt when I am not able to use my computer.

Such is my life---computers and laundry.

Computer Problems: Bittersweet

Here is the thing--I had a new entry almost complete. It was about laundry and growing up, but you will have to wait to read it. It takes me a while to create new blogs because I often do not take the time to sit down and write the whole thing. Additionally, the creativity only comes in short spurts.

So I was working on homework, believe it or not, on Thursday night when my computer decided it had had enough of working and functioning and doing its computer thing. So it shut itself off and hasn't worked since. This has created some problems---the blog being the least of these. But don't feel too sorry for me now...not doing homework has been really great...until Wednesday comes along after the computer has been fixed and the reality of homework sets in!

We currently have ten days of class before finals! Unbelievable. It is a bittersweet feeling. I mean I have a lot of work I have to do between now and finals, but work is work and it will get done. The thing that makes this semester coming to a close bittersweet it that one of my roommates is leaving for study abroad in January and another one is leaving in March. These girls aren't just my roommates but my very close friends. This has been a really great semester and it is weird thinking that next semester will be different. I don't think better or worse, just different.

This blog has been written on my sweet friend Alicia's computer. She is really great. And attractive.

This week: Crocs, CPR, Christmas music, Contentment

Some thoughts and events that have happened recently that you may or may not be interested in.

I have worn my mary-jane crocs to class two days in a row. Why you ask? Making a fashion statement perharps? No, actually. I have a little blister action going on and the mary-janes are the only thing that don’t hurt like you know what. I was given some really cute black flats by my parents over the weekend and then wore them to Jen’s birthday party…unfortunate. I guess I will have to break them in little by little. Blisters are a real problem for me because God blessed me with extra extensions on my heels.

I can save your life now. Well actually only God can do that, but if you pass out unconscious, I can break your ribs and dislocate your sternum any day you need me too. Today in HSES 220 aka the easiest class of all time aka First Aid, we worked on our American Red Cross CPR and first aid certification. I am really excited about the pocket mask. It is my first piece of medical equipment. I was so excited that I have to show Alicia when I got home. I think she was a little excited for me.

There are two types of people in the world. Those who like Christmas music and those who don’t. But this issue runs much deeper. I am one who doesn’t like Christmas music. Even if it is Dec. 24, I will turn the radio station if one comes on and I completely avoid stations that play only Christmas music. Don’t get me wrong, I love Christmas and I even love Christmas carols at church. But let’s be real. Christmas music on the radio starting Nov. 1?! In the words of my sweet roommate, “No thank you.”

My discipleship partner and I have been reading through a book on contentment. It has been really good so far. Inner calmness, rest from anxiousness, peace of mind, loving what God has allowed in your life at this very moment. Often I am looking ahead, what our culture would say is future focused. Although this is good in some ways, it can also take your mind off what God is doing in and through you right now. Right now is all we have. I mean we can plan for our next right now or the right now that will come in five years, but we are not promised those thens, but we are given right now. That is what God has blessed us with. God has given me right now. He may choose to bless me with many more right nows. At Jacob’s Well we sing this song. At first sing though it seems depressing, but actually it is so comforting.

I am like the grass.
Someday soon I’ll fade away.
I am like the grass.
Just as surely I will fade.

I am like the grass, and soon I will fade. All I have is right now. I don’t need to worry about the next right now, or the right now that I worry about that will come in 7 months, but no. I am grass and I have right now. The song ends with:

But Jesus you remain.
Jesus you will stay.

Right now is good.

Party: Taking it with me.

This has been the week of parties. I know my mom is not the most credible source on this since she is bias because she is my mom, but she says of my personality that I take the party with me wherever I go. Although, now that I think about it, she may not be saying this as a compliment, but I am still going to take it as one. Anyways, even though I may take the party with me, I don't actually go to a lot of established parties if you will. This week has been the exception.

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Not an offical party per se. Just my mom looking cute. Getting ready to "go out" to Wichita. Oh, our nice friend Spencer paid us a nice compliment by saying that we are like the same person...scary...scary for you all! We are the Ver Schrag girls.

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Tonight Rachel and myself attended a beach party casino night. I know confusing right. Am I suppose to dress for the casino or the beach? So I decided to remedy the confusion by making it even more confusing by making it a bonfire beach casino party!

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Halloween is over for 363 days. Alicia and I were truly as different as night and day. While dressing up for the party, I thought about how the world is missing out on hilariousness and I did so wish for a reality TV show. We made my headband twice against Alicia's will. It had to be cute, right? Guess how much we spent on our costumes? less than $2..holla!

Cold and Torn: Let's move away!

I am moving to Phoenix asap!

About this time every yeat I remember why I strongly dislike winter. I hate being cold. That is it, there is nothing more.

But I don’t want to just leave my family, friends, or even KU. So everyone needs to pack their stuff. We will leave as soon as class is over tomorrow. We will have a lot of moving to do since I would like to take all of KU (campus included) with me. I would also like to merge the cities of Lawrence, Kansas City, and Hesston and take them with us. This is a win-win situation for me because I would then eliminate the torn feeling. (In case you are unfamiliar with the torn feeling, it is that feeling that happens when your heart is never completely with you---it gets left in several places. It isn’t that you are unhappy, it is just that no matter where you are, you are missing someone.)

But before we start Google Earth-ing apartments in Phoenix, let’s stop and think about why Kansas winter might not be so bad. *thinking*

Let's shoot to leave at 5.

Fun Days: Living Life

Friday was fun. I ate supper at Ingredient with Leah. Our times of honesty, grace, and truth are always encouraging. Then I went to KC and went out with one of my best friends Jessica. We went to the Cheesecake Factory. I love to be with her. I see her every weekend, but we don’t often get to be together just the two of us. After eating supper and walking around the plaza chasing a fire truck and a shopping trip to Target, we went to our friends’ house to see their new place. Then Jess took me home and put me to bed. I was tired from my fun day.

Saturday was fun. I woke up at 6:45 and got ready to watch Leah run the KC 1/2 marathon. I got to run with her miles 5 to 9. I love the racing atmosphere! Just being there and running a little made me want to train and run another one. After Leah finished (with a great time!) Micah, Jess, Jen and myself headed north for a day of fun at Worlds of Fun. We rode the ride, we saw the shows, we enjoyed the Halloween attractions! Oh, and we stood in line for 2 hours to see a haunted house. I know, ridiculous! But even standing in line seemed to be fun. I don’t know, may it was the fall air, or the fact that I wasn’t doing homework, or that I was with some of my favorite people, but everything seemed so awesome and fun! I was also happy to go home and go to sleep because I was tired from my fun day.

Today was fun. We went to the 11:00 service at Jacob’s Well. Micah lead worship and did fantastic as always. Tim spoke about what we are harboring in our hearts and how everything in our lives flow from what is in our hearts. Then I came back to Lawrence and Rachel was home. It was nice to see her. We talked for a few minutes and then Alicia came home! This was really exciting because usually Alicia isn’t home on Sundays. I took a nap because I was tired from all the fun. When I woke up, Rachel said that her parents were ordering us a pizza. We watched the Chief’s while we ate our pizza. I am not a huge football fan, but watching football and eating pizza just seemed to be right today. Oh, but I do care about KU football…oh and we won yesterday! Anyway, I got some homework done. Genevieve had a rough day in anatomy lab, but the good thing is that she is feeling better. Took a trip to Target with Alicia who I also love to be with. Then I came home and Rachel made some cookies. I guess what I am trying to say is that I am tired now from my fun day.

Friday in Speech Class: and Other Unrelated Thoughts

Something happened in my speech class today that got me thinking about when I first decided to come to KU. I should warn you that this story really has nothing to do with what I am thinking about but it still applies, sort of.

My speech teacher, who I must first say I really like. I think she and I will be friends after this semester because being friends with your teacher while they are your teacher is against the “student code.” Anyway, my teacher was talking about persuasion. She painted this scenario about how you and some of your friends are out on Mass St. tonight. You and your group decided to go to a movie and you really want to see the new romantic comedy and one of your friends wants to see the new sci-fi. What do you do to persuade your friend to see the movie you want? Some of the replies from the class were offer to pay for their ticket, buy them popcorn, or promise to see the sci-fi next time. She was pleased with these responses. Then she posed this question, “Would it ever be alright to lie to persuade someone?” The answer she got from the class of KU students…no.

At this moment I had a million thoughts rush to my head. Oh my goodness, they just said no, which means they believe in a standard of truth, but they would never admit that. And then my thoughts turned to this which is only slightly connected to the above story.

People have said that KU is not honoring to Christ. Sure there are a lot of things that happen here that are not, but there are also a lot of things that are. Today I was thinking of just a few random ones. So I will write an outline that would make my speech teacher proud of how pieces of KU are honoring to Chirst.

I. Campus itself is a reflection of Christ.
-There are times when I am walking to class when I look around and am blow over by the beauty around me. Beautiful building with details that are unnoticeable unless carefully observed, grass that is manicured with seasonal flowers and over 1,000 trees, sweet chimes flowing through campus from the Campanile, and hills that create lookout points and amazing calf muscles.

II. Truth is being sought out.
-Never have I ever seen so many people who are wanting to know and understand the world around them. Often, this quest is misguided and is looking for meaning through being a well-educated person. But nevertheless, people are seeking to know truth and understand what truth is.
-As a part of this truth seeking, many students are hungry for Christ. Some people are meeting Christ at KU, some are learning to follow Christ at KU, some are growing in Christ at KU. Those who are following Christ are being confirmed in their faith by seeing how Christ offers a much better story for their lives than what is going on around them.

III. We are broken.
-Sure, KU is known as a party school. (side note: we did not make it on to the top 20 party school in the US this year for the first time in over 25 years. We should have a party to celebrate...wait, i mean...) Students here have problems and sin in their lives. But most of these problems could be solved with Christ’s love, a 12-step program, and rehab.
-I sound like I am making light of the partying, which I was in jest, but really it is not something that should be made light of. However, students here do have one thing right. They admit that it is a problem. And in this honestly with our sin and problems is where I think KU may be ahead of some of our churchs and Christian institutions.

I warned you my thoughts might not flow together.

KU needs Jesus and grace. The Church needs Jesus and grace. The end.

Old Blog: Still Agree

i wrote this blog right after week 9 of camp this summer. it has been fun to go back and read it now looking back over the summer and as whole and this week in particular. this week we were in a pinch for co-cabin leaders and this is how fantastic it worked out.

August 5, 2007.

a FANTASTIC week with mom.

setting the stage. A 10:00am phone call on Monday morning went much differently than expected. I called my mom to get a phone number of another friend to see if she would be willing to come yet that day to volunteer cabin lead with me for the week. Cabin leading this particular week involved being responsible for the well-being and fun of 18 girls heading into the 8th grade. Mom said that our friend would be unable to come due to previous commitments, but then half sarcastically-half seriously suggested that she come. “Would I for sure get to be in your cabin?” “Yes, Mom, please come! (scream)! I want you to come so bad! Call me back as soon as you know!!!” This is when mom realized what she may have just gotten herself into. And in typical mom fashion, she quickly lists off everything that would need to happen to allow her to come.
1. Call Lori to see if she can do care plans.
2. Call dad to see if he can take care of Grandpa on Thursday.
3. Work until at least 2 today to set Lori up for care plans.
4. Have a momentary freak-out. Done.
Four things on the list, one already taken care of. Short list, yet I have a sick feeling in my stomach that she is not going to be able to make it. After I hung up the phone, I had to go to staff worship. Usually something I relish in, but I could not even sit still. I even cried two tears thinking about how disappointed I would be if she couldn’t come. Fast forward to 6:28pm. Mom gets to camp! This is the story of our FANTASTIC week.

F is for fun. My mom is fun. It does not matter that she is 46 years old. Sure there were times when she was not the cool one…but that‘s what I am here for! Sometimes she felt out of place when the official camp fun was taking place. But lets be real, official camp fun is more ridiculousness than actual “funness.” She tired to participate in the cha cha side and scream her head off to get the spirit stick. But when the actual fun came out was when she would go water sliding with the girls or let them play in the rain instead of having reflection. Those are memories that the girls will never forget and a reason this week was fun.

A is for abnormal. Cabin leaders do not get nights off…usually. I had asked my supervisor at the beginning of the summer if I could have Thursday, August 2 off to be able to go to the Fray concert which I had a ticket for from a previously scheduled then canceled show. Jen said she would love to make it work. Her plan was to hang out with my cabin throughout the week and get to know the girls. Then she would stay in the cabin and lead cabin time and put the babies to bed. Just so happens that three cabin leader girls got sick week 9 making it so that Jen is unable to stay with my cabin while I went to the Fray. I offered to stay and skip the show, but Jen said, “No, Kayra (no not a typo, she really calls me Kayra) I promised you a long time ago. We will make it work.” As it turns out making it work was trusting mom to stay with the girls by herself with little guidance due to unforeseen and unavoidable problems. But Mom was great with the girls in spite of a torrential downpour and uncooperative girls.

N is for nurturing. She is a mom. She brings a lot of experience to the table that is valuable for the girls to get in on. After all, she put up with me when I was that age. Thank the Lord. I don’t remember being like the girls were¾ she said I was. As if…whatever! (eye roll)

T is for testing. Week 9 Cabin 13 was the most difficult cabin I have had all summer. Some say the cabin is cursed, and after this week I have reason to believe them. Bad attitudes and disrespect were a constant battle. All Jr. High students test the limits at first to see what is actually expected. They are experiencing freedom for the first time and are unsure how to handle it, but these girls did more than test the limits. We failed cabin inspection on Wednesday--a girls cabin has never failed all summer--so we spent some quality time cleaning during free time that afternoon. After this incident the girls realized that we were not the only ones who expected them to behave. But the battle still raged on.

A is for accurate. This is not the first time mom has been noted for her accuracy. One word-- dodgeball.

S is for scheduled. “Here at YouthFront Camp West we pride ourselves on running a smooth program. This is only possible if you as Cabin Leaders have your kids at events ontimeearly (yeah, all one word).” Can we all just take a moment to realize what they are asking us? Eighteen thirteen-year-old girls out of the cabin before 7:50am...sure, done!

T is for timely. Since I believe that everything works together through Christ who is sovereign over all I should not be surprised. But thinking back over how the events of the summer panned out to bring me to a place where I needed my mom week 9, I am pleasantly surprised. After weeks of doing the same thing and facing the same problems time and time again, it is nice to have your mom around to get taken care of. She wrote all the Christmas cards for me. (don’t tell the campers we write them while they are still at camp. It would ruin the surprise.) She woke the girls up one day when it was definitely my turn. Small things like that make my role much more enjoyable.

I is for insane. Mom got to see me in my element, as she so sweetly put it. Dancing is one of my favorite things in the world and the great thing about Jr. High girls is that they think you are a great dancer even when you are far from that. She watched as I was Mrs. Incredible, Nightstrike Barbie, Grandma Betty, Beach Party Barbie, and Birthday Princess Barbie. What mom wouldn’t want to see her daughter make a complete fool of herself…all for the sake of Jesus of course! Haha. Oh and the constant screaming and dancing at Hype. I love all that stuff too, mom not so much.

C is for community. For me, the most meaningful thing that has resulted from Mom sending a week at camp with me is that she was able to see my community firsthand. I have talked to her a lot about the staff as a whole and about individual people. She was finally able to get a glimpse of what makes camp amazing. It is not the blobbing or hype or even the teaching, but it is the community that God has blessed me with.

closing statements. At 6:28pm Mom arrived at camp. At 11:07 on Saturday morning, Mom left camp. The time in between changed both of us. I have always said that camp messes with your head. I think Mom may agree now. It is a good mess though. God meets people at camp. God mends relationships at camp. God draws people closer together and closer to himself at camp. Mom and I have always had a unique relationship and this week proved that even more. I had the privilege of co-cabin leading with one of my best friends as well as my mom. At the end of the week the cabin leaders have evaluate their co’s. How did your co do in leading the campers? Fantastic.

After the Final Rose: Kayla Tells All.

Deciding on the name of this blog was much harder than expected. I was torn between choosing a title that would reflect the more serious side of me, perhaps something more spiritual in nature. Or something that would reflect my unique personality, maybe something creative and witty.

I believe that everything is spiritual. Being a Christ follower is not a section of my life. I desire to be my life. It is impossible to separate the things that are considered spiritual from what is considered normal. So the unique mix of personality traits, and the randomness of my interests, and my style of writing all are spiritual. This began to solve the dilemma of naming my blog.

I decided to name it After the Final Rose after the ABC reality TV show The Bachelor which I faithfully watch. I have wanted my own reality TV show for some time. It would be riveting television--drama, hilarity, and some pretty dynamic characters.

You are probably confused now about why I was worried about spiritual things and then named my blog After the Final Rose. My life is not something that I have to categorize as spiritual and normal. Everything fits into the spiritual category. The drama, the fun, everything.

Welcome to the sneak peak of my show. God is writing the story and I am excited to see what happen.